The Play

Dad: Yelling. Louder. Sudden. Me: Quiet. Listen. Keep a straight face. Loud heartbeat. Dad: Ask a question. Intense eye contact. Me: Try not to look away. One word answer. Try to remain calm. Dad: Yelling. Rude comment. Swearing. Me: Flinch. Don't cry. Try to remain calm. Clench fist. Don't say anything. Dad: Finger pointing away.... Continue Reading →

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The Narrator

Ever since I was young, it hurt to exist so I made up a world where I didn't. Where there was pain and death, and tears, misunderstandings, laughter, joy, and love. I wasn't there to experience it and that's okay. I think some people are just meant to create. They feel too much to live... Continue Reading →

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I want to scream and yell at all of you Give me the opportunity Make me angry So angry that everything comes out All the things I want to say All the things you don't want to hear I have so much to say and I'm tired of being nice Being stepped on by your... Continue Reading →

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I've forced myself to do the "right" thing forever now and it's not working So please don't be angry that I'm taking a different path. The "hard" path. All the paths are hard. No path guarantees me anything.

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I don't think anyone understands just how impressionable I am. I take opinions and advice seriously and I will listen and obey. It's what I've been raised to do, it's all I've ever done. Thinking for myself is hard because someone always has an opinion and even though I may not want to listen, I... Continue Reading →

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Please don't yell at me Please don't lecture me Please don't look at me with those sad eyes that say I've made a mistake Please don't try to change my mind Please just let me be Or I'll break, Again.

Open letter to my anxiety

You're the reason I started writing again. As to whether that's good or bad, I'm not quite sure. Because pain makes an artist But this kind just makes everything difficult And I would only wish it on others so they could understand Because even my art can't say everything.

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Everything tends to hit me all at once And all I feel is pain and confusion as I try to figure out what the problem is. I wish you tried as hard to understand me as I do But maybe that's too much to ask for It wouldn't be the first time that I've been... Continue Reading →

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